Interviewing My Child
I know it's a little late but this is my first real day off from work and I have just remembered that I hadn't done this yet.
Interview with Jake, aged ten-and-three-quarters
1. What is something mum always says to you?
BE GOOD AT SCHOOL
2. What makes mum happy?
ME BEING GOOD
3. What makes mum sad?
ME GETTING DETENTIONS AT SCHOOL
4. How does your mum make you laugh?
BY STARING AT ME
*eh? no, I don't know either*
5. What was your mum like as a child?
I DON'T KNOW... I THINK SHE WAS ALWAYS GOOD AT SCHOOL
6. How old is your mum?
37
*spot on*
7. How tall is your mum?
I'M BIGGER THAN MUM BECAUSE I'M 5 FT 10... OR AM I 4 FT 10?
*he's not bigger than me - I've just proven it by standing up*
8. What is her favourite thing to do?
PLAYING ON MY DS AND HER LAPTOP
9. What does your mum do when you're not around?
PLAY ON THE COMPUTER AND WATCH TV
10. If your mum becomes famous, what will it be for?
BEING AN IDIOT ON NATIONAL TELEVISION
*um... moving on...*
11. What is your mum really good at?
TAP DANCING
*jazz hands*
12. What is your mum not very good at?
GYMNASTICS
*I could have sworn the bedroom door was shut...*
13. What does your mum do for her job?
BUSINESS STUDIES
*not a bad guess - I like to think it's more than that*
14. What is your mum's favourite food?
BEANS ON TOAST
*urgh, no it's not*
15. What makes you proud of your mum?
SHE TAKES ME EVERYWHERE
*yes, I bloody do - mum-taxi*
16. If your mum were a cartoon character, which one would she be?
EDD OUT OF ED, EDD AND EDDY OR THAT ONE OUT OF SCOOBY-DO. THE ONE WITH THE GLASSES
*he means Velma - it's a long-running family "joke"*
17. What do you and your mum do together?
PLAYING ON THE DS TOGETHER
18. How are you and your mum the same?
BECAUSE WE HAVE THE SAME RELATIVES
19. How are you and your mum different?
WE DON'T DO THE SAME THINGS
20. How do you know your mum loves you?
BECAUSE SHE GIVES ME STUFF
So there you have it. This is the next generation. Scary stuff!!